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Friday, September 15, 2006

AH BENG ... The Piss Of Pheiwry

Ah beng is the most sussesful student in kung fu traning in some remote part in China.

Being a top student , he got special previlage. That is he can surf internet with no limit.
After a years and years , he got a fren from MSN which he chating tru internet almost everyday.

So finally 1 day he talk to his teacher

Ah beng " sifu... i think i had train enough la . I want to go out and spread dis knowledge to around the world"

Sifu " good la .. i think is dis time you go out la and test your skill plus the internet bill soooo.... high leh! due to your usage."

Ah beng "sifu why you dun use broadband? monthly pay only $100 and unlimited of acess?"

Sifu "bladi hell why i didnt think of that? BTW since you want to go out i think you go to Ar-meh-dick-ka . your number 5 uncle is there we lost contact in about 10 years ago.

Ah beng "which wan? and why he ran of to Ar-meh-dick-ka? why you wan me to go there?

Sifu " aiyoh.... ask 1 by 1 la all ask in once.... kam follow me"

Ah beng follow his Sifu to his room and Sifu take out his photo and show to Ah beng.

Ah beng "wah!!! he look like blus lee la"

Sifu "yalor ..... the whole klass called him blus lee clone!

Ah beng "but why he run away?"

Sifu "like dis wan la"

And the skrin become blurrr and the skrin become clear and all the back ground change with all the man dress like Wong Fei Hung fashion and the woman with chinese style and some with englis style.

Sifu(befor he become sifu) "look she choose me oledi and she lafu me althought i lost to you"

Mastah mia dorther "yes i love him plusez dun hurt him any more, i hope you know."

number 5 uncle(this scence the camera shoot at the back of him) "i understand so bai bai i wish you to lived happily to greatgrandchild"

And the skrin blurr back and clear back and now in the room back with Sifu and Ah beng.

Sifu "and tats the setoli lor...."

Ah beng "why so simple wan?"

Sifu " aiseh... i setoli from begining it take long time lor....... . later you miss the fight. nah here the ticket. plus you dunno his face liao but he got tatto at his back you can reconize it. here the piktures."

Ah beng "hah? why 2? who go with me?

Sifu "my dother la she got ordisen in Hollywood you go with her la......

Ah beng "ok la thank you sifu....."

Befor Ah beng go to Ar-meh dick-ka he email to his MSN mia fren (oh yes his name is George W. Bush and colin powell). that said he will go to there and wan to meet them.
Ah beng and Sifu mia dother arrive at Ar-meh-dick-ka. and greet by both of Ahben MSN fren.And finallyAh beng open a kung fu training center at here and be come the most powerfull center in downtown and uptown. some he got kontrak with Hollywood.


















. (wait wait the setoli got more..... why END so fast wan......)

And so wan day that George W Bush and colin powell come and seek some help from Ah beng.Both of them wan to get some help from Ah beng from the moment he set his foot at Ar-meh-dick-ka.

GWB "Ah beng i cum here to say my wish veri long time oledi"

CP (tat colin powell la) "yez my man we huv problem bro. he control all over china town."

Ah beng "okla since you help me so much oledi i hepl ypu wan la."

And GWB and CP take Ah beng to chinatown to meet that misteri leader wan?

GWB "eh Ah beng while we go there ? can you show us the move again? we miss so much your move la."

CP "yalor show la"

Ah beng "okla i show you la. see this? dis called a tiger fist chun anot?

GWB & CP " hua!.......... veri chun lor........"

Ah beng "and this it called dragon style nice anot?"

GWB & CP " fiuyoh nice..... you the man"

Ah beng " and dis wan i neber show dis to anywan since i live here...."

GWB "wei! wat you doing ? you drunk kar? "

Ah beng " no la dis wan called drunken style wan...... . only high student get to teach dis."

GWB & CP " oh i see"

All 3 of them arrive at the spot of the misteri man wan.

GWB "Ah beng that guy la i told you about veli lansi wan...

CP " yalor gip your style and send him to sell salted duck egg"

But the misteri man change his cloth. Ah beng noyice the tattoo at his back and knew that is his uncle number 5 wan and soon he sked oledi......
but he dun wan drop his water face in front of that two ang mor fler.

Ah beng " hey you 2 now i wan to teach you two the highest kung fu at all.

GWB " huh? i thpought Drunken fist is the highest wan?

Ah Beng "no got more higher lagi . use dis wan in emengercy only?

CP " wau cool man... wei faster la...."

Ah beng " ok la dis wan called Sprint of the cheetah."

CP "wau eh...... faster show la"

Ah beng take a position and .....................................................
Take take a 1000 step and runaway from that place.......



janicepa said...

i was so blur with ur story at first... but later the end part... i smile.. cos of the sprint of cheetah thinngy ??

Good job !

Kenny Ng said...

wakakakakaka... like dat oso can ah?

AceOne said...

Oops..gua tarak understanding wat the stori.

ah nel said...

blus lee =terus lari when his name change to

Wennnn said...

Wah at first I also no understand the stoli la!! Abuthen in the end oni know wat happen! Aiyoh wonder who is blur la???

nyonyapenang said...

ah beng chicken-out la! LOL

mirror said...

okiela..this is my 4th time actually reading the story. just say i only get 40% of understanding....maybe

well..keep up the spirit of writting :)